Loved in Your Language :: Five Minute Friday

I’m linking up today with other bloggers to write for five quick minutes on the one word LOVED. To read other essays, drop by here.

We’ve been talking about the Fruit of the Spirit in church lately. You know them.

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control

There they are in big blue letters so that you can’t forget because Galatians 5:22-23 tells us that “against these things there is no law.” No law, so it’s good and lawful that we possess all of them. I can honestly say I TRY to mix the fruit into my daily life, and sometimes singing this little ditty helps:

“The fruit of the spirit’s not bananas. The fruit of the spirit’s not ba-na-nas. If you wanna be a banana then you might as well hear it. You can’t be a fruit of the spirit…..”

This song, learned during my years leading and counseling at church camps for elementary kids, helps me remember. (Trust me, you don’t want me to sing it for you.)

To love and to be loved is the first fruit, and scripture says it is the most important fruit.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” I Corinthians 13:13

How we love is up to us. Gary Chapman in his book The 5 Love Languages tells us there are basically five ways we show love to one another: acts of service, physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time and gifts. Some of us are fluent in all five languages, but most of us are not. We generally speak love in the language that comes most easily to us, and receive it in that language as well.

I’m still learning to give and receive love in the languages of those I love in my life. For my husband, physical touch and words of affirmation are important. For me, it’s quality time and gifts (I hate to admit that last one, but there it is).

I have to proclaim a small victory here. As my husband headed out to the barn after dinner recently, he tossed over his shoulder “You can come out and see what I’m working on if you want.”

I said I’d pass, I had stuff to do. But in the middle of my stuff, I realized what he was asking me: “Do you love me?”

So I went out into the evening, snapped photos of my sunflowers and took a picture of this, his project. And later, we talked about it.

Because I want him to know he is loved.




  1. jennifer

    Love that book by Chapman! And thank you for the reminder to accept when our husband’s offer to have us join them in something/somewhere. I am your FMF neighbor today.
    Happy Weekend! May we love and be loved well by Jesus and others.

    • Ingrid Lochamire

      I need that reminder myself almost daily! Blessings on your weekend, Jennifer!

  2. Lesley

    I heard that fruit of the Spirit song for the first time at a children’s club last week and it was funny to be reminded of it here! I’ve never read the love languages book but I’ve heard a bit about the different languages and it definitely helps both in showing love to others and in recognising when they’re trying to show love to me, even if it’s not quite in the way I’d naturally prefer. Visiting from FMF #10.

    • Ingrid Lochamire

      That’s my greatest challenge, Lesley. To not speak love in my language only. Thanks for stopping by!

  3. Tara

    Acts of service for me!

    • Ingrid Lochamire

      That would be an easy one for me, Tara! Blessings on your weekend!!

  4. Brian Van Osdol

    Thanks Ingrid. great reminders

  5. Beth Foreman

    Such a wonderful reminder, Ingrid, of all the different ways we can love. I really needed to hear this! It makes me want to pull that book off the shelf again and read it. I can get so wrapped up in efficiency — so much to do, etc. etc. etc. that I forget to meet my husband and others right where they are. Thanks!

    • Ingrid Lochamire

      Thank you, Beth. Me too! Is there a love language for us Marthas?

  6. Jennifer

    Well – I just had to go find that song on Youtube! Too cute:) I love children’s songs that stick with us…forever!!:)

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